BaKhabar, July 2010, Page-5

better light a candle than curse the darkness

When My Wife Took to Hijab

- Sharjeel Ahmad (sharjeel.ahmad@gmail.com)

It was a pleasant Sunday afternoon; the much awaited weekend! We, I and my wife, offered the Zohar prayers, had our lunch, and then set out for the famous Central Market at Lajpat Nagar (New Delhi). On an average, I ensure that we visit a good market at least once a month, so that we are able to purchase groceries and other household items required frequently. This visit was one of those monthly visits, but it brought something very fervent and important with it; and we thank Allah for the same!

A few days back, I had joined my mother and wife in a discussion over head scarves and related recent news-making events in Europe. We had discussed the issues with great interest, and had also noted at the time that a similar attitude had probably starting taking an offing in India; when I elaborated on another case where a Muslim girl in Kerala was dismissed from a Missionary school after she refused to remove her head scarf. The entire discussion culminated on an amazingly ironical point – neither my mother nor my wife wore head scarves or anything similar to cover their heads on a regular basis. However, I could see a sparkling resolve in the eyes of my wife towards starting to wear the same as soon as possible. My mother had also encouraged her for the same, though not very emphatically. More so because she believes that tenets of Islam must not be adopted forcefully. In addition, she herself was not using the head scarf; although my sister dons it as a symbol of Islamic liberation very proudly!

Now, we were at the Lajpat Nagar Central Market, when I suddenly spotted a lady wearing a head scarf and Abaya. The scarf looked so gracious and appealing that I could not resist compelling my wife to enquire from where the lady had got the head scarf. To our disappointment, it turned out that the lady was an NRI and had got the scarf from Saudi Arabia. Maybe next time, I thought to myself. Then we came to a store and spotted something like the head scarves. We went inside, and finally selected one for my wife after an elongated screening (it was actually a stole that could be used as a head scarf). The shopkeeper offered to pack it; my wife declined, and I stood there a bit astounded. She then pompously and audaciously put it over her head and asked me to pay; and I was moved beyond my imaginations!!

The first instant reaction that came to my mind was to feel all the prying eyes in the store looking at us. What might they be thinking? Surely they might presume us to be part of the stereotyped ghettoized Muslim community, isn’t it? The very next moment, I rubbished the thought by reciting “There is no other power worthy of worship other than Allah Almighty!”, and instantly felt the satanic thoughts shrugging me off. The next step was to triumphantly stand beside my wife and join her in her jubilant celebrations of her choice of embracing the modesty of Islam! Indeed, I am now a proud husband of a woman who has chosen to embrace the tenets of Hijab and Pardah with pride, honor, and dignity! I rose stirringly high in my own eyes on this accomplishment, although my only contribution to it was a few rupees for the cost of the scarf. We then extolled Allah and gleefully marched throughout the market as if we had clinched a victory!

Indeed, the liberty, modesty, grace, elegance, dignity, and exquisiteness of Pardah is unparalleled!! Pardah, the modesty of Islam, is unmatched in all other forms of exquisiteness! How it gives an all new pristine look to the entire personality!! However, you need those eyes, that heart, and the rational to accentuate it. Now, I feel more proud and vibrant; flamboyant would be a better word, while going out with my wife. We feel very fortunate and thank Allah for enlightening us with His words and leading us to the Right Path. May we be guided by the light of Islam always, Ameen!
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O Prophet, enjoin your wives and daughters and the women of the believers that they should let down over their faces a part of their outer-garments; it is expected that they will thus be recognized and not molested. Allah is Forgiving and Merciful. [Quran, 33:59]

75 Questions to Ask
An old proverb says, “He that cannot ask cannot live”. If you want answers you have to ask questions. These are 75 questions you should ask yourself and try to answer. You can ask yourself these questions right now and over the course of your life.

1. Why not me?
2. Am I nice?
3. Am I doing what I really want to do?
4. What am I grateful for?
5. What’s missing in my life?
6. Am I honest?
7. Do I listen to others?
8. Do I work hard?
9. Do I help others?
10. What do I need to change about myself?

11. Have I hurt others?
12. Do I complain?
13. What’s next for me?
14. Do I have fun?
15. Have I seized opportunities?
16. Do I care about others?
17. Do I spend enough time with my family?
18. Am I open-minded?
19. Have I seen enough of the world?
20. Do I judge others?

21. Do I take risks?
22. What is my purpose?
23. What is my biggest fear?
24. How can I conquer that fear?
25. Do I thank people enough?
26. Am I successful?
27. What am I ashamed of?
28. Do I annoy others?
29. What are my dreams?

30. Am I positive?
31. Am I negative?
32. Is there an afterlife?
33. Does everything happen for a reason?
34. What can I do to change the world?
35. What is the most foolish thing I’ve ever done?
36. Am I cheap?
37. Am I greedy?
38. Who do I love?
39. Who do I want to meet?
40. Where do I want to go?

41. What am I most proud of?
42. Do I care what others think about me?
43. What are my talents?
44. Do I utilize those talents?
45. What makes me happy?
46. What makes me sad?
47. What makes me angry?
48. Am I satisfied with my appearance?
49. Am I healthy?
50. What was the toughest time in my life?

51. What was the easiest time in my life?
52. Am I selfish?
53. What was the craziest thing I did?
54. What is the craziest thing I want to do?
55. Do I procrastinate?
56. What is my greatest regret?
57. What has had the greatest impact on my life?
58. Who has had the greatest impact on my life?
59. Do I stand up for myself?

60. Have I settled for mediocrity?
61. Do I hold grudges?
62. Do I read enough?
63. Do I listen to my heart?
64. Do I donate enough to the less fortunate?
65. Do I pray only when I want something?
66. Do I constantly dwell on the past?
67. Do I let other people’s negativity affect me?
68. Do I forgive myself?
69. When I help someone do I think “What’s in it for me”?

70. Am I aware that someone always has it worse than me?
71. Do I smile more than I frown?
72. Do I surround myself with good people?
73. Do I take time out for myself?
74. Do I ask enough questions?
75. What other questions do I have?

Email: bakhabar@biharanjuman.org 5